10.

Due to my circumstances I hang around seniors a lot and I don't think people realise just how much people didn't talk about things back then. I've heard matter-of-fact stories of doctors making decisions on behalf of people with life-altering (and occasionally life-ending) circumstances and patients just going with it, schools holding people back and student and parents just going with it, people matter of factly describing things that construe abuse and sexual assault these days that everyone just went along with.

I'm fairly sure a lot of the angst on the internet and elsewhere that has sprung up in the last few years is a direct result of people realising at the same time, 'wait, this situation I'm in might be normal, but it's not actually any good' and additionally, realising a large number of people agree with them, and the resulting conflict with social norms forthwith.

And this is one of the reasons I can't actually hate Tumblr as much as my contemporaries. A lot of Tumblr activism is horribly misguided and a lot of users give me the whoops. Complaining about that makes sense to me, sure. But I don't see that, what I'm starting to see is heavy pushback from the 'smarter' 'older' people, not about the times when Tumblr activism goes rotten pear-shaped, but about people complaining about whitewashing and abusive relationships and etc at all. And they're so self-congratulatory about their cutting responses to these people. It makes me physically sick!

Maybe most other people don't have abuse weaved through their own history and the histories of their families? I dunno.

Anyway, it's also one of the reasons I left Twitter etc and I'm now alone on Dreamwidth, more concerned with resisting the urge to drink iced coffee than how to make friends on the internet. I am JONESING for a Coffee Chill you have no idea.

10.1.

Writing is happening but in a disjointed sense where I can conjure ideas and put words down, but making the words coherent or detailed or enjoyable to read is another story.

I can console myself that at least part of my creative brain is working.

However, I was hit with inspiration for (of all things) a weird and plotty Invisible Inc Xu/Sharp fic (yeah I know)* and I am wondering if anyone (besides one person) will even read it.

Cos writing is like pulling crocodile teeth and if pretty much everybody will look at the pairing, say 'wat' and just leave, maybe I should put my effort somewhere else. It's annoying. I'd much rather take a 'I'll do it because I feel like it' attitude, but I'm forced to consider filtering myself simply because of mere current physical limitations. Yeesh... I should become a robot, too.

_{* Mature-rated at most. No CLANG CLANG CLANG to speak of. Sorry (??????)}